Sam the card flounder

Thinking about it, It's probably better for a wolf not to drink coffee.

She growls when I get near her coffee. That's almost human.

Sam the card flounder

You're not going to bite me. I'm going to take that coffee now.

If you stop to think, you'll see the flaw in that plan.

Come on, now. You don't seem the biting type. Even if you were, you're genetically engineered. That probably gives you some pretty strong inhibitions against harming a human.

And the flaw in my plan is: By stopping to think, I gave you enough time to drink the coffee.

Would you like the cup back?

Sam the card flounder

Okay, you've had one cup. Now no more coffee. You've lost a lot of blood and I don't want you taking any stimulants.

Besides, I want to get a brain tissue sample and I can't do that while you have caffeine in your system.

[!1.2]HEY! I WAS KIDDING! PUT THAT CUP DOWN! THAT COFFEE'S MINE!

Sam the card flounder

I was just kidding about the brain sample. I am curious though.

You were alert with a body temperature of 31 C. That means you're not using human neurochemistry.

So, do you think you could remain alert during a congressional acceptance speech?

Sorry. My genetic designers were good, but they weren't miracle workers.

Sam the card flounder

How smart are you? Are you as smart as a human?

Oh, no. Not at all.

I've read the works of Feynman, Newton, and Einstein. Take someone like John von Neumann. He not only realized you could take programming out of hardware, he came up with the rules of how to do it in a single afternoon. Nothing my species has done comes close to that.

She's right. She's not as smart as a human. She IS smart enough to make sure any human who asks knows it.

Sam the card flounder

Are you hungry? You're watching every bite I take.

Hmm? Oh, sorry. Outmoded survival trait.

Real wolves have to watch the alphas carefully to see when they can eat. I'm not sure how strong my instincts are, but I've always liked watching people eat.

Sounds like a Bowman's Wolf is easy to amuse.

I'll keep in mind this is from the species that invented the Yo-Yo.

Sam the card flounder

This is good. What is it?

Puffed locust.

Insects are healthier for you than meat. They're high protein, low fat, and as long as you stay away from the blood suckers, aren't likely to carry pathogens that can jump the species barrier.

That's well thought out, logical, and well reasoned. But it still doesn't change the fact that I just ate a bug!

Sam the card flounder

Did you want something to eat?

No thanks. I'm not hungry. What I would like is to know your name.

I never told you? Sorry. I'm Winston Scudder Thurmad.

That's all that's needed, right? No sniffing involved?

That's fine. No offense, but it makes me nervous when a human starts sniffing at me.

То самое окончание mad на полуразвалившейся табличке

Sam the card flounder

What is it with dogs and sniffing anyhow?

Well, it gives you a lot of information about the other individual. Not just how they're doing now, but how they've been for the last few weeks.

In any case, I'm glad you didn't try to sniff my behind.

Of course not. That would be rude, crude, and socially unacceptable.

I sniffed the toilet.

Sam the card flounder

Don't get up.

I'll carry you. I don't want you putting any weight on that leg.

You might have hurt yourself.

[!2.0]KLONK