Sorry for saying dickweed, dickweeds

For t-rex and utahraptor, WE ARE THE SUPERINTELLIGENT APES WHO TOOK OVER AUSTRALIA. DID I JUST BLOW YOUR MIND??? YEAH, PROBS

You know when a government program called «atoms for peace» creates «atomic gardening» that you have reached… Peak 1950s

THE ACTUAL ANSWER IS: frig man, go to an actual doctor and tell them an internet comic about «fatching your blood pressure» made you worried about your eyes leaking bodyjuice!! that's precisely what theyre there for!

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Another reason to visit Europe is all the UNESCO Heritage sites there! Whats that? «UNESCO»? Oh, thats just the United Nations Eldritch Skeleton Corps Outreach

TRICKS TO TEACH YOUR CAT: A great cat trick is «Watch as the world burns». All cats know this trick instinctively and no training is required.

Make every day earth day! pee in the ocean every day. DO IT, THERES NO SUCH THING AS THE PEE POLICE

Before you email me to say breaking bads eponymous main character wasnt called «breaking bad», search your heart, and i believe you will find that my version of events is in fact 1000% true

BACKUP MORAL: BONE WHO YOU WANT, THERES NO WAY TO TELL WHETHER YOULL BE VIRGIN-SHAMED OR SLUT-SHAMED A THOUSAND YEARS FROM NOW SO WHO CARES