I have a medical reason why I can't rock a rhyme that's right on time, a medical reason. A medical reason, a medical reason, a medical reason, a medical rrrrrrrrreason

NO i did not just lose some data because I BACK MY DATA UP. Beats me, man. Beats me why most dudes don't back up their data. Sure as hell ain't my scene.

There are a lot of characters with short names in dinosaur comics because if i have a character named «Lord Longfirstname the Extremelylargenumber» then all there's room for him to do in most panels is say his name and that's it. EXCEPT FOR DROMICEIOMIMUS, AND I LOVE HER

YES, this works especially well for James Bond movies: «When This Single Father Says 'Live And Let Die', The Reason Why Will Make You Cry», «The 13 Greatest Things That Only Come From Russia, And No, Love Isn't #1!», «This Man Discovered One Weird Trick That Lets Him Live… TWICE! Doctors Hate Him», «I Dare You To Watch This Video And Then Tell Me That The World Is Enough»

This one goes out to Guy On The Streetcar Who I Guess His Phone Battery Died?? Dude I Can Only Imagine What Your Deal Is

ALSO IF YOU HAVE AN IMAGE OF YOURSELF LICENSED UNDER THE CREATIVE COMMONS BY-SA 3.0 UNPORTED LICENSE THAT WOULD SAVE ME A LOT OF TIME

And me all this time thinking it was non-non-NON heinous

And it's like, HELLO, why would I ever want to be friends with people whose opinions are objectively WORSE than mine??

Sir, it's my job to make eye contact with you, approach you and your group of friends, and ask if I can get you a drink. i'm a bar keeper, not a bar creeper.

CREDIBLE CANDIDATES FOR BEING THE TRUE IMPULSE BEHIND ALL HUMAN ACHIEVEMENT: sex, love, greed, wondering what it's like to be a dog