«EVEN IF YOU STORE MY PASSWORD IN AN ENCODED OR HASHED FORMAT (RECOVERABLE OR OTHERWISE) YOU CONSENT AND AGREE TO MY TERMS; AGAIN: NO TAKEBACKS AND/OR MULLIGANS»

Anyway, please, come in: I've thrown a party and invited everyone I know! Just a heads up: I will be judging gifts by size and what the cards attached do say

THE ROCK IT TO THE BANG BANG BOOGIE SAY UP JUMPED THE BOOGIE TO THE RHYTHM OF THE BOOGIE THE BEAT HOW DOES THAT TASTE CAMUS

God damn it, babies, you've got to involuntarily practice some degree of autocannibalism

This comic contains 100% facts except for where I refer to the two men «Telegraph Joe» and «Telephone Tim», in real life these two inventors never met / existed

«Life hack» is the new «pro tip» is the new «gosh you should really know this already»

I think, therefore I am? Pfft. I didn't leave the house for a week and watched reality tv endlessly and showered only once and at one point tried eating flour because it seemed easier than going to the grocery store, therefore I am.

Assuming we don't worry about breathing, then disappointingly the vast majority of the ceilings would be thirsting to death after 3 days of not drinking anything. STAY HYDRATED OUT THERE

I feel like i should remind you of this fun fact: everyone who ever died is WATCHING YOU RIGHT NOW

The shambling remains of Captain Hero advance toward Trish as she stumbles backwards, her eyes still closed. /YOU BELONG WITH ME/, he shrieks.