At the museum

The museum of Earth history. We'll go in through the roof. It's the easiest way in.

It might be the most common way for crooks to enter, but I'm not sure about easiest.

Sure it is. This building operates with government funding.

Once it was shown that most burglars come in through the roof, equal opportunity laws forced them to put in handicapped access.

At the museum

Success! We're in and we didn't have to pay admission.

At the museum

Wow! Sam! Look at the size of those things!

Hard to believe giants like this once existed on earth.

They're as big as houses!

Yet today their brains would fit inside of a walnut.

Let's keep going, Helix. We can come back and see the dinosaurs later.

Aww.

ENIAC, EDSAC – первые ламповые компьютеры, построенные в конце 1940-х годов

At the museum

Hey! It's a diorama showing the first human landing on my planet. What an awesome moment!

For centuries, humans had been searching for another intelligent, tool using race. Then they found us. I still remember that cosmonaut's first immortal words.

“Let's keep looking.”

Brings a tear to your eye, doesn't it?

At the museum

Does it bother you that humans consider your race a disappointment?

They were a disappointment to us, too!

We don't have space ships. We didn't know about microgravity or how things float about if not secured.

When we finally got into their landing craft and found everything locked up and bolted to the floor, we thought humans were a lot more like us than they really were.

At the museum

We need to return the Star Wars disk to that stand.

This will be a tough job. We've got to be sly. Any errors and we could end up like the Jedi, beaten senseless by a pair of Sithies.

I put the disk back.

Helix, it's bad form to complete a job while I'm still talking about how difficult it's going to be.

At the museum

Okay. The disk's been returned and you've looked at the dinosaurs again. Now let's get out of here.

I can go out the front door, back up to the roof, and retie it.

I'm not trusting your knots after that. We'll both go so I can be sure our escape route is tied off properly

At the museum

It's a good thing we weren't trying to steal anything. Museum security is on to us. We're going to be stuck here for hours.

A trap only needs to slow you down enough to be caught. Pits, quicksand, Poll takers. I was looking for traps for me. I didn't think they'd be sneaky enough to set a trap for Helix.

And for Helix, the most effective trap is a gift shop filled with stuffed animals.

After dinner

Rene Descartes, Philosophy. Blaise Pascal, Pressure and the first mechanical calculator.

Louis Pasteur, Germ theory and using weakened strains to make vaccines.

They did quite a bit, didn't they?

Artists, engineers, scientists, explorers.

Yet when I think of the French, I think of cooking.

Me too. Probably because I remember a good meal more fondly than my last series of inoculations.

After dinner

Do you want dessert?

No, thank you. I'll be right back. I need to… powder my nose.

I really just need a moment of privacy. I can eat fine in public, but there's no dignified way to lap water out of a bowl.

It's not easy to talk about either. Whenever I say I'm going to the bathroom to get a drink, people always get the wrong idea.