The inspector cometh

Odds are that I've met this inspector before. There aren't that many of them.

The first rule of how to pass an inspection is to take anything that might cause you to fail and get it out of sight.

Good luck, Florence. If you need me for anything, I'll be in my room.

The inspector cometh

Time to sit back and see what's on the screen. I can trust Florence to handle the inspection.

Wait a second. I've survived because I don't trust anybody. Yet here I sit trusting Florence?

Drat! I need her. I don't think I can run the ship without her. But man, she is such a corruptive influence!

The inspector cometh

An inspection request from Sam Starfall's ship. What is that little squid up to now?

Well, let's get this over with. I better go through the checklist.

• Credit card and wallet safely locked in desk? Check.
• Gloves on so fingerprints can't be lifted? Check.
• Micro prism glasses so iris and retina pattern can't be stolen? Check.

The inspector cometh

I can't see Sam's ship being ready for inspection. This has to be a trick. I'll need to keep my eyes open for distractions. He's going to try to throw me off balance.

There's the ship. Better shape than I expected. What is that in the doorway? Some kind of animal?

Hi.

I've got to admit it. If Sam's trying to throw me off balance, he's off to a good start.

The inspector cometh

Good afternoon, Sir. The spaceport computer informs me that you are my inspector. I am 1071-CCN, standing by for inspection.

Standing by. I would like to say I've still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence in this inspection. … Still standing by.

Sir, might I suggest your time could be better utilized by inspecting my rear end instead of the engineer's?

The inspector cometh

Hey! It's Mr. Inspector Man!

Hi, hi! Do you remember me?

Yes! Stay back!

He remembers me! We'll get a good inspection now. Last time he was here, I was the one who extinguished him.

The inspector cometh

I've met Sam and Helix. Who and what are you?

Florence Ambrose. Bowman's Wolf and ship's engineer.

Hopefully today won't be like your previous inspections here.

But I've survived all my previous inspections here!

Yes, this is definitively going to be an uphill battle.

The inspector cometh

Your concentration's not going to be on the inspection if you're worried about getting hurt.

So what would it take to make you feel safe here?

A full suit of powered armor and two back up squads of veteran marines.

Would you settle for a handshake and my promise that I'll watch out for you?

The inspector cometh

Sam usually tries to distract me. Why do you want me to inspect this ship?

This is the first time I've repaired a ship with this much damage.

I need another knowledgable person to check my work to make sure I haven't missed anything.

You WANT me to find if you've made a mistake?

Definitely. If I've missed anything and we don't find it, Mother Nature will, and she's very unforgiving of engineering shortcomings.

The inspector cometh

It will be easier to see what repairs have been done on the big screen in the control room.

The control room has an exit to the outside that I'll leave open and clear for you at all times.

Okay, let's go.