Freefall 3331 - 3340
[!1.5]Attention on deck!
[!1.7]What was that!?
Protocol. I announce when the captain of the ship has entered an area occupied by the crew. You are to stand at attention. It is a sign of respect.
You never did that for me.
I repeat. It is a sign of respect.
The ship wants a human captain.
I have an idea.
I have an idea.
I'll be the captain the ship wants. You be the owner/operator. That puts you at the top of the ship's command structure and me one step below. Besides, we both know who's really in charge around here.
I was going to say “Me” to counter you saying you, but yeah, I can't argue with that.
Spaceships have tiny crews. In a small environment like this, we all have to work to get along.
We make an extra effort not to get on each other's nerves and we're more tolerant. There's a good reason for all of this.
If you take out another crew member, there's no slack and you have to do their work as well as your own.
Laziness. It saves lives.
This ship has a lot of A.I.'s, who are deferential to humans.
They won't tell me when I'm getting on their nerves, so I need you to tell me if I'm being a jerk.
No, this isn't a trap.
Then you came to the right sqid. I am an expert in telling humans they're jerks.
Still reading about accounting? Isn't that boring?
Are you kidding?
All your greatest thieves used creative accounting! Enron, 74 billion dollars! Bernie Madoff, 65 billion! Even small thefts like looting the Malaysia development fund netted 2.7 billion.
I haven't gotten to a trillion dollar theft yet. That's what keeps a story interesting. Knowing the best parts are still ahead.
Humans lie, cheat and steal. Our two species are going to get along great. We both like doing the same things.
This though. I used to think we were great thieves. After reading about human heists, sqids need to seriously up our game.
Humanity! Go to the stars! Be an inspiration to the alien races you meet! Talk about being careful what you wish for.
Triple tap on the table and it will open an interface window.
Okay, now it's time to learn how to close the interface window.
Thanks. Even now I run into something that everyone is supposed to know so there's no explanation of what it is or how it works.
That's the share symbol and I'm surprised you can even pronounce it.